Name Games

If you want to piss me off, call me "William." If you want to infuriate me, refuse to call trans people by their names.

Despite the fame of Sean Connery in a slew of James Bond movies, as a kid named Sean I constantly had my named mispronounced. Most commonly I’d be called “Seen.” Other times, “See-ann.” Occasionally, it was “Shane,” which was either a mispronunciation or confusing me with my second cousin.

Once during seventh grade, a substitute teacher who was the wife of a local Baptist preacher had a premonition during roll call and asked if “Sin” was present. I dutifully raised my hand while everyone giggled.

All that didn’t bother me too much. I went through elementary school with the last name “Bugg,” of course I’d heard much worse. That teasing — “Stomp the Bugg! Get the Raid!” —caused me to hate my surname for a while when I was very young. With age and an urge for self promotion, I learned to love it. Most American names are a dime a dozen, “Sean Bugg” is unique enough that I rule my Google search page with ease.

So feel free to call me Love Bugg, I’m cool with it.

Still, there’s one thing I’m no…